Fate of Dragons Read online

  “God, Sienna, how I needed you to be the one. Even if you weren’t a mage, I was coming back for you. Even if you had moved on, I was going to come fighting for you. I’ve always known we were meant to be.”

  “I don’t believe you,” I told him honestly. “It’s been years.” My voice came out in a raspy whisper. My throat felt sore, tight. I’d believed that, too, a long time ago. I would have sworn that it was Fate, that we were meant to be always and forever, mush and more mush. But I’d stopped believing in forever years ago. When forever never came back.

  He turned, facing me. His eyes were red-rimmed. “I came back often. You need to know. Flew over at night, sensing you here, alone. I thought about you constantly, wondering if we’d have the chance to connect like we did when we were young.”

  He walked towards me, reaching out. Had he read my mind?

  “I gave you my protection before I ever knew what I was doing.” He pointed to my chest where the claddagh hung over my pajama top. “Any treasure a dragon bestows on you holds part of their power. Unknowingly, I gave some up to you. And I marked your land when I returned. To keep you safe.”

  I had lost my words again. I was rooted to the floor in my frayed kitten pajamas with a half-naked man I used to love looking at me like I was a life preserver. Surreal seemed to be my thing now.

  He rubbed my arm absentmindedly and took my hand. “Then we came under attack. The rising power, the dark mage with the ability to sever dragon bonds. He struck us, bent many shifters to his will, keeping them in dragon form, unable to shift back, subverting their will. Most of those who fought him and survived the severing were killed. Few escaped. I don’t know where my family is, if they’re even—”

  “Don’t think that way.”

  He paled and swayed slightly, the exhaustion kicking in. I held him to me as I guided him to the bed.

  The heat of his fever was back. I welcomed it inside, siphoning it out of him. I had to get the poison too. It worried me the most. I pushed him down gently and allowed myself the luxury of touching him. I wanted assurance this was real, him in front of me.

  He was going green again, an opalescent sheen on his skin, and I realized what was happening. “Wade, are you shifting?”

  He groaned, shaking his head no. He clutched his side again. “Mage.” The last word was pained, gritted out between his clenched teeth.

  He passed out, limp as wet laundry. I worked fast, drawing out the poison in him just as I had with Leeroy. I needed another daylily. And more bloodroot. This was definitely magical poisoning. I could practically touch it, an amorphous entity growing inside him.

  He was unconscious as I worked on him. His face had relaxed again. It was easy to see the boy I loved lying there and feel all the complicated emotions swirling around me. I wanted everything he said to be true, about coming back for me, about us being meant to be. And part of me just wanted to protect myself from everything I was feeling now, from what I might feel again if I let myself. After all, it had been seven long years, seven long, lonely years here in the mountains where I both belonged as much as the rocks and at the same time didn’t belong at all, with my wildwood magic and no family. No, I didn’t belong anywhere. Or to anyone.

  But once, I had belonged to him. I’d given him my heart, and I’d been willing to give him everything else too. All of me, the real me. Then he left, and when months became years, I’d closed that space off. What was soft and sweet had grown hard and bitter. No one got in now. It was better that way. Saved heartache for later.

  It was all I knew.

  When he was resting comfortably, poison gone, fever abated, I took off his shoes and applied lavender and cedarwood oils to the soles of his feet. The sleep he needed would come peacefully and without nightmares. Something I should have done for myself these past days.

  I left him there and slipped into the garden to pluck a few daylily blooms that hadn’t wilted yet. I returned to him and arranged the flowers at the foot of the bed.

  My hand stilled over the petals. I hesitated to use the spell. Using it on Leeroy was one thing, but stealing Wade’s memories was another. Then again, he’d come to me, asked me to help. That would be helping.

  But also invading his privacy.

  He reached out in his sleep and found my thigh. He sighed, rubbing me in a familiar way that we used to have. He smiled and relaxed back into sleep.

  His hand was heavy to lift, and though I moved it to his side, he brought it back to my leg again before rolling slightly and sighing in his sleep.

  Love you.

  My heart hammered against my ribs. I knew I didn’t imagine what he’d said to my mind. Words I’d wanted to hear since he’d left seven years ago. It was stupid to feel elated now. Stupid to want things I couldn’t have. Stupid to do what I was about to do.

  I had to tell him. This stasis was my curse, never being able to say how I felt. I should have told him when he left. I should have said stay.

  I pushed his hand away one last time and pulled the pieced quilt I’d made over his bare chest. The last time I’d seen him shirtless, I’d traced a protection rune over his heart and promised to love him forever. It seemed an eternity ago. I let my fingers graze over the spot briefly, retracing that rune now and saying the spell again from memory. I even allowed my fingers the luxury of exploring his muscular arms before leaning in and pressing my cheek to his.

  God, how I wanted to whisper in his ear all the longing of the past, the need he’d reawakened.

  But whatever I wanted to say was stuck somewhere in my throat. I turned off the light and hovered there in the doorway. The sound of his breathing hitched my own. He was really here again.

  Wade.

  He stirred slightly.

  I…

  Salt met my tongue as I licked my lips. I turned away, closing off that dream again, even though it was like trying to put the lid back on Pandora’s box.

  It hurt. I let my mind connect to his, felt that warm hug he sent out even asleep. I turned away and shut the door.

  Goodnight, Wade.

  4

  Sleep ran from me like a pack of wolves, howling and on the hunt for a fight.

  It found it. I fought myself all night.

  What was the right path now? What should I do next?

  All I could think about were those two words. Just like he used to say. I remembered the first time he said it. We were star gazing up at the falls. He’d lined his pickup with blankets and pillows, brought an old, beat-up green thermos his dad had had in the army. It was filled with black coffee. We wanted to stay awake all night, waiting for some comet to come around.

  But that night, I’d fallen asleep on him, and he’d tucked a flannel blanket around me before dozing off himself. When we woke, it was two in the morning. We’d missed whatever had happened in the heavens, but that didn’t matter. We had our heavenly event right there on earth in each other’s arms. We shared a sweet kiss and nothing more, but it had been… magic. There was no other word for it.

  And now he was lying in my bed while I tossed on the couch. So close. So far away. We weren’t the same people. Nothing was the same.

  Except that familiar pull, the connection we’d shared since we were kids. It was nagging at me now, sharing his frustration, feeding it with my own.

  I got up, unable to do anything else but start the coffee and prepare for the day. I’d missed my visits yesterday. Mrs. Stout would be fine. She was just a nervous first-time mom wanting to check if everything was okay on a daily basis. If she’d practice her meditation exercises, she’d be much better off. And Mr. Winters, who had closed himself off from the world, well, he might not notice if I didn’t show up. He’d probably miss his chocolate bar if anything.

  I dipped a spoon into the coffee grounds and filled the filter to make enough for eight cups. That should see me through the morning until I could get a grip on what to do next. How could I help?

  I thought of little Gage. Maybe not so little. He’d
be twenty now, a man himself. I prayed that missing didn’t mean dead. God, how awful that would be. My heart shrank from that possibility. It would tear Wade’s world apart. Already had. I knew it, felt the pain he was holding and nursing. His whole family was suddenly gone.

  It broke me in two. The Harrises had been like a family to me. His mom and dad were the nicest people I knew. They treated me and Gran like we mattered, not like the stain on the tablecloth that many in the community had. The whole town blamed me for that fire, looked at me like I was a monster.

  Which I was. If I hadn’t been a pyromancer, a dragon mage, unable to control my powers, maybe I wouldn’t have been abandoned. Maybe my parents would have wanted me. Maybe no one would have died that night.

  But I was atoning for that with all the good I could do for everyone. I knew it wouldn’t bring my foster parents back, couldn’t change the past. And I’d never forgive myself for that. Neither would anyone else. That night stuck to me like flypaper. It was seared on my soul, a sin I could never erase. I knew it would never even out, no matter what I did. But I had to try.

  Wade groaned in his sleep. Then there was silence before the sounds of the bed creaking meant he’d woken too. I was glad he’d slept some. The potion I’d rubbed on him had done the trick. At least for a while, he had been at peace.

  I glanced up at the clock. Five a.m. I shrugged into the thin cardigan I’d tied at my waist over my pajamas and had a moment of self-consciousness, worrying I looked like a sleepy librarian.

  Then Wade stumbled in looking like Jason Momoa with shorter hair and a more intense gaze, if that was possible, and I really felt like a lump. I tried not to stare at his abs or that damn dip at his hip that trailed off into territory I’d better leave be. He’d left a boy and sure as heck came back a man. We’d both changed. I wondered how much of the old us remained.

  “Morning.” God, he even sounded sexy first thing in the morning.

  I, however, squeaked out a “Hey.”

  Brilliant exchange.

  He grinned and gave a slight head tilt toward the coffee that made one of those dark curls fall across his forehead. “That for me too?”

  I bit my lip and tried to focus on what he was asking.

  “Yes, yep.” I probably looked like a bobblehead with the world’s most awkward nods. “Have whatever you want.”

  “If you’re offering...”

  I was sure I was blushing. I turned, opened the cupboard, and handed him a mug without looking at him until I thought I could not react. I gathered my thoughts and looked his way. He gave me a wry lift of those sexy lips and turned the mug so I could read it. ‘Blow Me. I’m Hot.’

  Shit. I couldn’t help the heat creeping up my neck or the smile playing at my lips.

  So much for not reacting.

  I busied myself looking in the fridge for nonexistent man food. There were two bags of carrots, fresh veggies I’d picked yesterday, and eggs from Liddy Taylor’s hens. They were payment for a sleeping potion remedy, like the one I’d used on Wade. Liddy herself was a good egg, one of the only folks who’d been kind to me when I’d moved in with Gran.

  I tapped my nails against the stainless steel door. “Would you like some eggs or toast or— I don’t know what you like anymore.”

  His warm hand gripped my shoulder. The calluses were rough against the thin chenille fabric of my cardigan.

  “I like you. And eggs. I’ll eat just about anything. Same as always, Sienna. Still me.”

  I sidestepped him and his comment and carried the carton over to the stove. “How many would you like? I have some scallions, too, just pulled them yesterday. And peppers. Omelet?”

  “You were always a good cook. But I thought you hated gardening.” He took two eggs from the carton and cracked them straight into his mouth.

  “Gross.” That made my stomach lurch.

  “It’s an acquired taste. But it’s necessary.”

  “Never would get used to that. But yeah, gardening is fun when you aren’t being forced into child labor.”

  “Ha. I’d hardly call picking greasy beans child labor.”

  “You never had to deal with Gran’s iron will to get them to market.” I broke half the carton into the pan, pausing to pick up a tiny sliver of shell. “But she was fair. After the bills were paid, she split the rest with me.”

  A memory of buying school clothes at the mall made me smile. “Oh my gosh, you know what I miss?”

  “No, what?”

  “Remember those little dots of ice cream we’d get after a trip to the mall?”

  “Yes, those were dangerous little things. ‘Bout froze a hole in my tongue.” He worked his mouth like he was remembering that feeling.

  I found myself doing the same thing. “Forgot about that part. Is it terrible that I still want some?”

  He laughed. “No, you always loved the strawberry. Me, I’d prefer a good chocolate shake. Maybe mint chocolate. With whipped cream.”

  “Well, for now, it’s eggs.” I pivoted to the fridge and grabbed a chunk of cheese. “You didn’t say on the vegetables, but I know you want some cheese.”

  “See? You do know me. Yes, cheese. Lots of cheese.”

  Our gazes locked.

  I cleared my throat. “So, tell me about this mage. Who is he? Is he a dragon mage too?”

  Wade looked away and ran a hand through his tussled hair. “Maybe. He might be more powerful than any of us knows. Truth is, I never saw him. He’s never been seen. He speaks to all the dragons, forces them to shift and stay that way. Then he severs their bonds when they don’t bend to his will.” He paused. “But if we had a mage…”

  “If he’s that powerful, what makes you think I can help? We should find someone who knows more abo—”

  “Because he couldn’t sever ours.”

  I stood there with the spatula in my hand, holding it like a lifeline.

  “But we’re not mated. I mean, we’ve never…”

  “I know. Imagine if we did.”

  God, I had. My face probably gave that away too.

  He kept going. “I didn’t realize it until he tried to strip it away. My thoughts were only of you, and though I felt him trying to rip you away, I held on. I couldn’t have done that if we weren’t… Well, then I came here, and you confirmed what I had hoped would be true.”

  “But he still almost killed you.”

  “But he didn’t. I’m still here.”

  Wade touched my arm, and I fought to suppress the succession of shivers as he moved to take my hand.

  He brought it to his lips. “Thanks to you.”

  “Don’t mention it.” I swallowed hard and turned back to the eggs. “So, what’s your plan now?”

  “I need your help. I don’t know how many have been killed, who is in hiding or where, which is just as well because it can’t be found in my mind if I don’t know.” He paced the length of the bar. “If you can somehow break his hold, speak to them. I don’t know. You’re my mage.”

  He softly corrected himself before continuing his pacing. “A mage.”

  I felt that lump that was my heart trying to work its way up my throat again.

  “I’ve never practiced being a mage. Fire I know. Dragons, not so much. Other mages, not at all. I didn’t know there was another like me. So, I don’t know what help I can be, but I will cloak you and do what I can.” I dusted my hands and handed him the plate of cheesy eggs. “Eat. I’m going to check my books, see what I can find.”

  I cringed as he lifted the suggestive coffee mug to his lips. I opened my mouth to ask him why he hadn’t just told me, come back at any point, but instead, I spun on my heel and stalked off to the spare bedroom I’d turned into a library.

  No use crying over spilt milk. Or shattered hearts.

  5

  Gran’s book of lore and wisdom was a giant tome that had seen better days. It was mostly herbal remedies that I had committed to memory, some spells hidden to prying eyes, some of the ancient ways written
down so it wouldn’t be lost.

  I missed Gran. She’d taken me in when no one in the whole world wanted me, and she’d given me a purpose, a life of healing. Like hers. Even though many never knew the ways she touched their lives, I did. It was beautiful. Her compassion and generosity were missing in the community now.

  And I missed her so much it hurt. I was the second foster kid she’d raised. My mother had been her first, and Gran considered my mom her own. My mom and Gran had the same wildwood magic in their veins even though they weren’t technically related that we knew. But the fire I had, it came from a father I never met. Gran didn’t know who he was either. My mom never said. She took that with her when she left and never looked back. But Gran picked up the pieces. To her, I was her granddaughter from the moment I arrived. I never knew a harsh word once I stepped past her threshold.

  I sighed loudly. Something of great beauty had been lost when she left. Those shoes were too big for me, but I was damned sure gonna try to fill them.

  I searched her collection for something to help Wade. There were so many things to consider. The fever, the poison, and who knew what damage had been done to his mind when the mage had tried to strip away his bond. To me.

  I still found it hard to accept. Our bond was one I knew was strong, but the implications of what he had said made me hopeful and angry and sad and happy all at the same time. I wanted some time to sit with this, to sit with him, time to process. I needed to know if us was something I wanted now, something he truly wanted, not just a means to an end.

  None of that would matter, though, if I couldn’t save him.

  But he wasn’t the only one who needed saving. His parents, his brother, whole families were in agony in the clutches of some evil mage. The thought spurred me to find something to cloak Wade from his sight.

  I’d done similar spells before, but this one needed a little more firepower as it were.

  The book had nothing I hadn’t already considered and nothing that would be an easy fix. I’d simply have to adapt.

  I slipped out by the back porch, not wanting to deal with Wade at the moment. The path to the river from Gran’s cabin had most of what I needed. Bark from an elm, moss, lichen, and the rest, I’d have to improvise.